It’s been many years since I was a young mom. I wanted to be the best mother I could be, so I read lots of books, searching for answers to all my questions. I read and heard so much condemnation and fearful advice.
Couldn’t someone, wiser and more experienced than me, just tell me how to do it right?
I love my kids, yet I was often insecure about my mothering skills.
Clergy, teachers, experts never seemed to be able to offer the assurances I was looking for and the nonjudgmental support I was craving.
So I learned by doing, growing, and making mistakes.
I was a faithful, involved church goer, always wanting my kids to watch the right shows, say the right things, believe the right stuff.
In my journeys around the world, observing different cultures, doing humanitarian work, ministering to people who lived in chaos that made my chaos look like a picnic in the park, I also discovered (and am still discovering) what it truly means to be one with the Creator, apart from rigid doctrines and traditions made my man.
Finding Oneness With Our Creator
I have learned to really know the characteristics of God: Love, Joy, Peace, Wisdom, Creativity. He is forward moving, never offended, always and constantly forgiving, over and over again.
Like the roses at the entrance to my driveway: always gorgeous and fragrant and reproducing, whether I stop to smell them and appreciate them or not. My roses never get annoyed when the japanese beetles feast on them; they are never hurt because I don’t comment on how pretty they are.
They just are. They are content and perfect the way they were created, doing what they were created to do.
I am one with the Creator of the Universe. So are you.
At my core, and yours, we are one. We are love, joy, peace. It is our nature to be so; and we are most happy when we are acting out of our true nature. It is an eternal nature. It is always true. It is basic. It is life-giving and powerful, not because it tries to be, but just because it is.
When we learn to connect to our true nature, we are at peace.
I chose “Mommy Zen™” as the name for this blog because Zen is a kind of meditative, peaceful state that de-emphasizes established doctrine. When we live in a zen state, we are nonjudgmental and open to enlightenment.
Moms Are the Center of Influence in the Home
MommyZen™ is directed particularly to moms because of the old adage, “If Mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy.” Moms are the center of the home and arguably the most influential person in their children’s lives.
Our world is in dire need of strong, peaceful, centered leaders who don’t act only to please others or for power or wealth, but for truth and justice — leaders who act from a place of inner strength and humility, who can make decisions because they are trained to hear for themselves the still small voice of God, not some doctrine that they have been taught to fear.
Motherhood is a Sacred Trust
Our children are indeed our future and, as the pewter plate that I have hanging in my kitchen says, “The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world.”
Moms, we have a sacred trust. Use it wisely and enjoy the process. Just breathe.
Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist